英文笑話，你能get到笑點嗎？

常聽朋友們說，聽老外講笑話，通常是人家笑得花枝亂顫，自己卻沒聽懂，只能尷尬地附和抽動嘴角。今天我們就來看一則笑話，其中的雙關語(pun)、同音(homophone) 、反諷（irony）的使用，往往就是這些笑點的來源。

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, （get canned是被炒魷魚了，can又指罐頭，在果汁廠工作肯定會涉及到罈罈罐罐的）but I got canned ... couldn't concentrate.（concentrate有兩個含義，一是專註，一是濃縮。在這裡，作者說他不能將果汁濃縮，實際上說自己不專心工作）

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack,

but I just couldn't hack（hack也有兩層意思，一是搞定某事，一是砍伐。這裡的雙關在於，表面上是說自己做為一個伐木工不能給「砍伐」，實際是說自己搞不定） it … so they gave me the axe.（axe又是雙關，字面上是「斧頭」，give sb the axe是成語「開除某人」）本頭條號與微信公眾號同號，更多內容敬請關注。

After that I tried to be a tailor,

but I just wasn't suited for it （suit是雙關，字面上是「衣服」，這裡指「不適合做」）… mainly because it was a so-so job.

Next I tried working in a Quick Fit Centre,

but that was exhausting（quick fit是快速適應，而exhausting是精疲力盡，這裡有反諷的含義）.

I wanted to be a barber,

but I just couldn't cut it.（理髮師的工作是cut hair，但說某人don』t cut out to be是說「天生不是那塊料」，這裡用cut來雙關，並且將cut out to be 稍做了改動）

Then I tried to be a chef, figured it would add spice （spice是香料，也可以做「趣味」；廚師的工作肯定會用到香料，這份工作作者原本也希望可以增加些趣味）to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme.（thyme是香料的一種，「百里香」，發音與time一樣，讀者請自行腦補其中的笑點）

Finally, I attempted to be a deli（熟食店） worker,

but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.（mustard是芥末，cut the mustard是個常見的成語，即搞定某事；作者在熟食店工作，肯定會切這個切那個(slice)，結果他連mustard都切不好，當然又把工作搞砸了）

My best job was being a musician,

but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.（note是音符，與上一段的musician呼應，而noteworthy是沒有引起注意的；這裡是用note來做文章）本頭條號與微信公眾號同號，更多內容敬請關注。

I studied a long time to become a doctor,

but I didn't have any patients.（patient做名詞用，是病人，做形容詞用是耐心的。對待病人要耐心，而他想當醫生，卻沒有耐心，當然就沒有病人找他了）

Next was a job in a shoe factory,

I tried but I just didn't fit in.（fit in與前文中的shoe呼應，就是「適腳」，你去鞋廠工作卻不fit in就是不適合那裡的工作了）

I became a professional fisherman,

but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.（這個也很好笑，net income是凈收入，而net本身有漁網之意，與漁夫的工作相呼應）

Thought about becoming a witch,

so I tried that for a spell.（這裡是拿spell開刷；spell是咒語的意思，跟前文做witch（巫師）相對應，而for a spell是過了一段時間）

I managed to get a job working for a swimming pool maintenance company,but the work was just too draining.（這裡拿drain說事兒，drain是耗光，其分詞形式，也就是這裡的draining是讓人精疲力盡的；而泳池的工作是需要「注水」或「維持水位」，你去「耗光」，下場可想而知。）

I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes,

but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.（up to it是夠格的意思，up也有「朝上」的含義，人在動物園飼養長頸鹿，卻「夠不著」，咋飼養？）

So then I got a job in a gymnasium,

but they said I wasn't fit for the job.（這一段的笑點在fit，設想在健身房工作的人，自己是不是該fit（健康的）一點？結果他被證明是wasn』t fit（不適合）這份工作，或fit in）

Next, I found being an electrician interesting,but the work was shocking. （shock是受到打擊之意，做電工要是不小心觸電，那就是shock，而shocking也有「震驚的」含義）

After years of trying to find work, I finally got a job as a historian,

until I realized there was no future in it.（做歷史學家，當然是往後看的，所以no future，沒有前途；這裡用到了反諷這個修辭法）本頭條號與微信公眾號同號，更多內容敬請關注。

My last job was working at Starbucks Coffee,

but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.（在星巴克咖啡店工作，當然會涉及到grind，即磨咖啡，整天磨啊磨的，就產生了另一層還有「枯燥的」）

SO I RETIRED, AND I FOUND I AM A PERFECT FIT FOR THE JOB!